clyde hated the long ride to get tampons from the market for his wife, but at least the scenery was beautiful.
are you kidding me? angie had a fucking bachelor of science degree from a top ten school. christ with this job market.
when i’m about to order a salad but someone else’s pizza passes by me
please. dan could not bear to hear about the kardashians one day longer. and dan was only one day old.
googled “dog swearing” and wasn’t disappointed
His fucking look of determination. Like, “you’re going to fucking jail Greg.”
greg is fucked
"so help you dog"
sandra wondered how long she could keep their attention with this sweet look before they discovered she’d managed to check off an item on her bucket list by somehow pooping in the microwave